Posts Tagged ‘Stress’

Your Favourite Activity is a Key to Managing Stress

Thursday, January 7th, 2010

As I walked out of the office building towards my car, all I could think about was the task that lay ahead of me the following day. Being a product manager and architect for a software company, there were always interesting challenges presented to me. In this case it was finding a solution to a complex issue experienced by a customer which had consumed most of my time all day without a positive result. I was feeling quite tired and drained, and was worried that I would not be able to find a solution to the problem. I was starting to get stressed.

Tonight was kung fu training night, the night I looked forward to every week, but because I was totally preoccupied with the problem I had no desire to go. I felt somewhat lethargic and I just wanted to go straight home and eat dinner. Despite how I felt, I decided to go anyway. I walked into the kung fu academy and got changed into my gear. I then started to warm up before the class doing the regular standard body stretch I always did. As I stretched, all I could think about was work. It was really consuming me.

Being one of the most senior students in the academy that night, my teacher asked me to take the warm up for the class. Directing a class of 20 students was the last thing I wanted to do. I hesitantly started the class with some standard joint rotations, followed by some light stretching, and then finally picked up the pace with a little cardio including various punches and kicks. Within 20 minutes, I had almost forgotten what had happened at work and was feeling quite energetic. I then spent the last 5 minutes of the warm up doing some really cool drills that all the students liked. After a total of 25 minutes, the class including myself was pumped ready to be taught some new techniques by our teacher, and I was feeling great, having no concerns about work what so ever. It was the last thing on my mind.

The rest of the class was awesome. The teacher decided that we were going to have an intense session of kicking the pads followed by light sparring. By the end of the night, I was dripping with sweat. Even though it was a hard workout, I no longer felt lethargic. In fact I felt like I had more energy than when I started.

As I walked out of the Kung Fu academy that night it dawned on me how different my attitude was to the problem that lay ahead, compared to when I first walked in that night one and half hours before. It is amazing what impact, an activity that you love, has on your mind set. I felt like I the problem that had previously consumed me was now no big deal at all.

I ended up enjoying the rest of the night eating a light dinner with my wife and relaxing with her in front of the TV. After a restful sleep, the next morning I woke up with a few potential solutions that had magically manifested over night. Sure enough I had the problem solved within a couple of hours that day.

David Tomaselli is the creator of Stress Management and Self Improvement Techniques – The Wholistic Development Exchange. The aim of the Wholistic Development Exchange is to empower you to deal with stress, pressure and the day to day challenges that life brings by providing you the latest Tips, Techniques, Articles, News, E-Books, Products and other Resources related to Stress Management and Self Improvement.
To download free E-Books go to our Free Stress Management E-Books section.
To find out how to create an Extra Hour in your Day, have a read of our NEW seven part Time Creation Tips series.

Managing Stress

Monday, November 16th, 2009

You have heard someone tell you that they are under too much stress, but do you really know what stress is. Stress is a real reaction our bodies have to outside stimulants and it can be measured. When we are under stress our blood pressure and heart rates rise, we breathe more quick, our bodies produce more adrenalin and blood is pumped to our extremities. What our bodies are doing is preparing us to run away or fight the danger we perceive. This is called “flight or fight” reaction. This is a very good thing when there is a real danger to us.

It is stress that gives us the added energy we need to meet tight deadlines. Many people find that they work the most efficiently under stress, as their bodies are revving them up to perform at their best, but stress can also be harmful to our bodies. When we produce too much stress toxin and do not give our bodies the chance to release that stress, we have too much left over toxins in our bodies. Think about if there was a real danger ahead of you, like a bear. If you were walking along in the woods and a bear jumped out in front of you, your body would be under stress. It would produce the necessary chemicals for you to run away. You would run away and this exercise would release the toxins your body is producing. This is a perfect design for dealing with danger.

However, in today’s modern society, the stresses we face are no longer (usually) in the form of giant grizzly bears coming across our path. Instead, we face deadlines, bosses, projects, pressures and family problems. There is no longer that automatic release of the stress through running away. This is why stress-induced problems are on the rise today. We have more people with high blood pressure, heart attack, ulcers and diabetes problems. This is because of the exposure to prolonged and unmanaged stress in people’s lives.

So, what can you do to manage the stress in your life? First, avoid creating stress where there is none. If you have a tense family situation, this does not have to become a source of stress. Deal with the problem and then move on. Do not let it fester into stress in your life. Start and exercise routine. Vigorous exercise is one of the best ways to reduce the stress toxins in the body and our modern society, unfortunately, does not emphasize exercise the way it should.

Not only should you exercise regularly, but you should also relax on a regular basis. Our bodies were not made to go twenty-four/seven. Try to find at least twenty minutes a day where you can do nothing but relax.

One of the best pieces of advice for dealing with stress is to set realistic expectations for yourself. Do not take on too much and do not set expectations too high. You know what you are capable of doing. When you try to go beyond your capabilities, you create unnecessary stress. Avoid doing this and your life will be much less stressful!

Michael Russell

Your Independent guide to Stress

The High Maintenance Manager Work with Them or Leave Them

Thursday, July 23rd, 2009

Over time, I have heard from several
people who shared their stories of working with
high maintenance managers (HMM). The most interesting
were from people with family businesses whose
spouse or parent is a HMM. That adds some interesting
implications!

What happens when your HMM has crossed lines with you? Ideally
you want all conflict, especially from situations where
you feel beaten down, to cease. If you have years of
experience working with all kinds of people (including
a few HMMs), you know that striving for conflict
resolution with this type of person can sometimes
be rewarding, and is often frustrating. How far you’re
willing to take the process with this person will
depend on what has defined the person as being a
HMM and your current state of affairs (i.e. your
stress level).

Use the Help of an Advocate

Does your HMM respect (and even fear) someone at
the office? Could that person be your advocate?
This is probably the best alternative for getting
the person to change his or her approach and for
reducing the amount of your stress. This is what
I did – and have done a couple times – and it worked
well. It’s important to try to talk with the HMM
first, before going to the advocate. It is also
helpful if you, the HMM, and the advocate can meet
together. If that is not possible, a discussion
between the two of them while you are absent is
the next best thing.

The advocate needs to know and understand the HMM
from experience and needs to understand the issues
at hand. Be brief and to the point when you update
him or her, giving an executive overview” of the
problem. If they talk together in your absence,
get an update from the advocate, noting the points
discussed, the position taken by the advocate
during their meeting, and the advocate’s perceived
response by the HMM.

Then schedule a new meeting with the HMM, making
certain you are no longer steamed when you meet.
If necessary, schedule a meeting for a few days
later.

Meet With the HMM

Whether you have an advocate or not, you will need
to meet with the HMM. Because HMMs tend to talk
very fast and to think while you are talking
(rather than listen to you), remember to speak
slowly. When you take a turn to talk, count 1 or
2 seconds before you start. Be deliberate.
If necessary, write out notes before the meeting,
bring the notes with you to the meeting, and use
them. Notes will help you stay focused.

Start the conversation by mentioning something
positive. For example, “When I heard that you
were selected to manage the project, I was glad
about that because I knew you were bringing a
lot of experience to the project.”

Don’t back down on the issues. Don’t wimp out.
Don’t make excuses for the HMM. Don’t accept his
or her excuses (you can listen without agreeing).

See where the conversation goes as you discuss your
points. Are you getting any agreement? Is there
evidence that you are being manipulated? Is the
HMM trying to fight with you or is she trying to
solve problems? Can the HMM agree to disagree
with you agreeably? Or does he agree to disagree
in a disagreeable fashion?

Getting Pushback

If you don’t have an advocate, and meeting with
the HMM proves to not help very much, you need
to decide how much you can take. What other types
of changes can you make? At what point does life
become too short to deal with the situation?
Some of us put up with way too much for way too
long. After some time that can really wear you
down, making you susceptible to stress and disease.
Is it really worth it? If not, what can you do
to make a change?

~~~~~~~~~

As of this writing, I’ve come up with 18 bad habits
of high maintenance managers. I’ve had some fun
discussions with people who currently work for a
high maintenance manager and they’ve found
it helps to tell stories and
laugh in order to use the laughter to lower the
stress about their situation.

If you are currently in a work situation with a
HMM, can you find an advocate to help you out?
Will you meet with the HMM to discuss your issues?
Are you getting pushback? In the meantime,
can you discuss it with someone and laugh?

© 2005 Borgeson Consulting, Inc.

Glory Borgeson is a business coach and consultant, and the president of
Borgeson Consulting, Inc. She specializes in working with executives in the
“honeymoon phase” of a new position (typically the first two years)
to coach them to success. Glory is the newly appointed executive’s
Secret Weapon!. Top athletes have a coach; why not you?

Click here for Borgeson Consulting, Inc.

This article was originally published in The Business Express, Borgeson’s
free monthly ezine. You may subscribe by clicking here:
Ezine

Tips For Managing Your Boss

Thursday, April 9th, 2009

Let’s face it: we all have a boss, maybe more than one.

Whether you are the CEO of a global corporation, an assistant to the assistant or a solopreneur, we all have someone we must answer to and who in some way determines our success. There is the unspoken agreement that the person on the other side of the desk will evaluate your work and make decisions that could impact your career and maybe influence your life decisions.

Many of us think of managing as supervising the people who work directly for us. This is only one aspect of a much more complex dynamic.

Let me share with you a well-kept secret.

Successful people spend as much (if not more) of their time getting into orbit and building solid relationships with those who have influence and power than they do supervising their direct reports.

We call this “Managing Up” – where time and energy is spent getting those above us to do and think with you and about you.

OK, I can hear you now.

“Jane that is all well and good but…”

“I already have too much to do, don’t put another thing on my plate.”

“I work for an egotistical, mercurial maniac: do you really think he cares about me?”

“Manage my boss, I can’t find my boss!”

“Should I speak with this week’s supervisor, last week’s or next week’s?”

“I don’t want to look like some kiss-up. They’ll see right through it.”

“I am a hard working adult. Why should I have to play these games?”

“His personal life is a mess and I don’t want to be his shrink or repairman”. Etc, etc, etc.

I hear you, but I also want you to know:

The average successful executive spends 10%, yes, a full 10% of their work time, creating and nurturing professional relationships – a lot of it with decision makers.

Sound impossible? Too hard? Let’s think of a few incentives.

- More people are fired for lack of chemistry with leaders than for incompetence.

- You will not be in the room when your salary, bonus or promotion is discussed. Your boss will.

- Someone will eventually replace your boss, why shouldn’t it be you?

It is hard to support someone you really don’t know. Does your boss know you and your work well enough to represent you?

- Admit it. Layoffs and transfers rarely are impartial or objective. It is harder to let go of a person you know and like.

– The smart people can recognize an individual’s work. Even if your boss takes all of the credit, your signature will jump off the page. Get on the page.

Let me ask you…

What if I told you you could hire a smart, motivated person who does high quality work with limited supervision? Projects will always be on time and on budget. This person will seem to know what you want before you do and will offer suggestions and innovative ideas on a regular basis. The hire will also demonstrate support for you in public and will disagree with you in private. What if the employee could be trusted in word and action? He/she will also have just the right balance between telling you enough and not overloading you with details. Did I mention that this potential hire is great to be around, actually knows you as a person without getting too personal, can laugh, throws off stress easily and will say “no” to you when you are being unreasonable. You will look forward to seeing this person. As a team you enhance each other’s performance. Your new employee is ambitious and wants to succeed: both of you will. Your boss likes your choice and that will be favorable to both of you. Warning! The employee is an individual and will hold you to your word and will expect you to carry your share of the work.

You have 5 seconds – Do you hire him/her?

Five more seconds – Are YOU this employee?

Let’s translate this into ACTION TIPS that will help you manage your boss with ease and greater success.

Know the person not just the title. I often hear people refer to senior executives by title. “The Sr. VP told me…” or “the head of HR said.” While this establishes rank, it also shows how you view the person. You wouldn’t hire someone without knowing them, how can you work with someone you don’t know? Work at finding out more about the person you work for, their interests and passions. Be aware of what keeps him/her up at night, what is his greatest work fear and what would be a great embarrassment for her? A quick glance around your boss’s office is a good start – photos, objects on walls, even the screen saver can tell you a lot. Start slowly with some questions and gauge the reaction. There is truth to the adage about staying away from religion and politics. Is there a topic that always brings a smile or a comment? Many executives are actually very shy people (even the big mouths). Others are private. Remember the higher up, the more isolation and the less people know about the real person. People think they are wasting time with small talk. It is valuable when done appropriately and with a respect for time. It is how you build a relationship and relationships are how you build a career. Statistics show that top achievers spend 10% of their work time building relationships, many of them upward.

Let your boss know you. There is nothing more awkward than a plane ride, lunch, or even standing on line with someone who knows nothing about you at a time when talking business is out of the question. Offer a glimpse into your life. It doesn’t have to be particularly revealing but sharing the fact you saw a great movie, that the skiing was the best last weekend, or saying how happy you are that your child’s team made it to the finals feeds a conversation. Asking for advice, maybe about a good place to eat in a certain city, is flattering and not invasive. All of this shows another dimension of you, a willingness to be open and throws out some conversation starters. Also, what does your workplace say? If you want it to say “I am professional and have a life” carefully select items that reflect you “the business person”. No one wants to see photos of you in a bathing suit (I promise), your kids maybe, but not you. On the other hand, if you have a wonderful collection of vintage pens display them proudly. Note – people who have nothing in their offices always made me think they were on the verge of quitting or not planning to stay long. Move in; look like you are planning on being part of the team.

No surprises. I was in the habit of saying to my employees, “The only surprises I like are in blue boxes with white ribbon that say Tiffany & Co. on the top.” Everyone likes to deliver good news. Be the one your boss knows will tell him/her before disaster strikes. The worst experience is hearing of a problem from above because no one informed you. Tip: When bringing bad news, have possible solutions in hand so the focus leans forward, not on blame. Whenever possible give bad news in-person. It is easier to measure the impact and shows courage and responsibility. Face-to-face also affords you the opportunity to be part of the rescue squad. Be careful how you phrase bad news. It is what it is so don’t “sandwich it” with small talk or irrelevant information. Attempt to be neutral about the message and keep it factual. If at all possible, do not deliver surprises to anyone just prior to a big presentation or meeting unless it is relevant to the moment.

Know the biorhythms. Your boss’s and yours. If you are an owl and your boss is a lark figure out what is a time that is best for both of you. Try for those times when scheduling meetings and phone conversations. There is nothing worse than a cheery person in the morning when you are not a morning person. Or a person running down the hall to talk with you when you are catching a late night train.

Take what she hates off of her desk. All of us have tasks we hate to do. Figuring out what those are for your boss will make her happy and will give you less grief. When I say “take it off her desk” I don’t necessarily mean you do it, but figure out a way to get it done or make it easier for her to do it. No one knows all the ins and outs of every application. Share your knowledge. The more free time your supervisor has, the more quality time you will get.

Schedule time together. It doesn’t matter whether the person you work for is down the hall or on another continent, having time together to agree upon strategies and tactics as well as keeping each other informed is essential. E-mails are the easy way to avoid conversations and delay buy-in. Regularly scheduled time together is best. Request the slot. Offer to set the agenda and honor the time limit. Never underestimate the quality of time on a plane, in a car or before a meeting.

Self-evaluations are important. If you work in an organization where self-evaluations are part of the performance appraisal process, know how influential they can be. Also know that most executives hate writing performance evaluations and are terrible at doing them. This is why you must invest time and effort in writing yours. I cannot tell you how many times I saw my exact words reflected on the final document. Speak in measurable terms; focus on the highlights not a laundry list of completed tasks. Always show how the team, department, organization and, of course, your boss, benefited from your stellar work. Give your supervisor talking points that will make the compensation committee conversation easier and more financially rewarding. Note: Self-evaluations are much easier to write if you work on them throughout the year. Keep notes in a file and then refer to them when the time comes. Do this at least once a month and included praising e-mails and articles you wrote.

Praise publicly and argue privately. This adage is true for couples, parents, as well as you and your boss. The attribute most desired in employees is trust. Not that you have to agree but that your boss knows you will not shoot down an idea or argue a point at a time he will lose face. Does that mean you lie or deceive, of course not. What it does require is for you to disagree one-on-one or with the knowledge that you do not see things the same way. The weaker the leader, the more you have to watch for this. Holding back is not an option.

Encourage your supervisor to market you. I was happy to have mentors but always better compensated when I had a sponsor(s). A sponsor (not the ones in AA) is someone who pounds the table in your defense when you are not present. She advocates for your promotion and negotiates the best deal for you when the sharks are circling the bonus pool. Don’t assume anyone is spending too much time thinking about your career. They’re focused on their own. But there is a way for you to get someone to sponsor you. First of all, ask for what you deserve and have earned. Acknowledge to your boss that she has the power to influence the decision. Ask how you can help her do the marketing – talking points, images, direction. Let the person know you trust they will be pushing for you and how beneficial it will be for both of you. Never threaten, let them scare themselves.

Develop a solid relationship with your supervisor’s assistant. Never under estimate the power of the executive assistant. She/he is often the eyes and ears of an executive and his/her opinion holds and wields considerable weight. Assistants are gatekeepers, timekeepers, calendar rulers, the image maker and the informant. Many executives, including myself, have no tolerance for anyone who even tries to abuse their assistant. Build a relationship, show respect for the position and acknowledge the influence.

Do you work for:

A micro-manager? Micro-managing is a form of control and people who feel a lack of control need assurance and re-assurance. Keep in mind that changing this behavior is very difficult and that some people have been forced to micromanage because they have been let down by employees in the past. Suggestion: At the beginning of each project agree as to how you will keep your boss informed. Over communicate. Send a daily e-mail, share the file online, or leave a voicemail, whatever will assure the person “I am on top of the project, everything you expected is being taken care of and I will let you know if anything changes”. Stick to the format no matter how boring or wasteful it seems. Start using phrases like “you can trust me to”, “let me assure you”, “you can count on me to…”. Keep in mind that for a person like this to trust takes time and positive experiences. In the meantime try to remember a situation when you attempted to control something — How did it feel? What made it easier to deal with? What kind of project or person makes you want to micromanage?

The Super Critical Boss? There is nothing wrong with constructive criticism; in fact it is often the best teacher. But what about the manager whose message is always “nothing is good enough”? Not to get too psychological with this but we know it is really his/her problem and probably one with a long history. So first and foremost you have to filter the criticism. Repeat to yourself – “This has nothing to do with me as a person”. Stating the obvious can be very beneficial. Try a technique coaches use when a naysayer is in the group- predict the behavior. “Now, I know you will spot the problems but I was wondering if you can share the pluses?” Some companies schedule supervisor reviews or 360 degree instruments. This would be a time to identify the problem. I have never seen a situation where the super critical boss picks on only one person. If you are experiencing the pain, so are others. So again, don’t take it personally. If the criticism is unbearable and it appears nothing is going to be done to rectify the situation I say “get out” – get a transfer or find a new job. This kind of environment is toxic.

The Do-Nothing Boss? First of all make sure you are right. Many executives are responsible for work that they do not share with their employees and are actually working on things divorced from you. Assuming this is not the case, you must first decide if this is such a bad thing. I have had supervisors who created more work for me when they did something than when they didn’t and generally it was useless fluff. Next, understand the politics. Why might this be tolerated by senior management? Some organizations are paternal to a fault; others have more important things to watch (a good indicator that you need to move to a more dynamic place internally or on the outside). If your boss is the dumb, unemployable daughter and you are in a family run business you have your answer. If none of this is true, you need to get your mark on everything you do. Just because someone does not work does not mean they don’t take the credit. Write the memos, start saying “I”, deliver the presentations so that it is clear you are the author. While this is going on strategize getting away from the do nothing-boss. The last thing you want is to be associated with the department. Start shopping for “new and more challenging situations” and do it soon.

Here is your assignment:

Step 1 - Monitor the amount of time you spend building relationships with your supervisor or other people of influence.

Step 2 - Look for opportunities to increase the quality and quantity of time growing work relationships.

Step 3 – Increase your contact by 10%

Step 4 – Figure out which profile best fits your boss and apply some of the tips discussed in the description.

Step 5 - Which profile is the way you manage?

Steps 6 – 15 – Choose one “Action Tip” each week and apply it to your repertoire.

ExecutiveCoachNY: Career strategies for the competitive edge

Having difficulty starting or completing this assignment?
Seeing yourself in many of the descriptions?
Want to get sustainable results in terms of
salary, promotion and less stress?

What to do?

Contact Jane Cranston, at ExecutiveCoachNY.
Schedule a free get-acquainted appointment.

Jane Cranston is an executive coach and management consultant based in New York City with clients nationwide. She coaches individuals and teams to enhance their people management skills and gain the competitive edge at work. Clients who work with Jane report receiving higher compensation, increased recognition with less stress and greater ease.

Jane brings 20 years of senior corporate experience as well as the satisfaction of opening 3 successful businesses. Trained as a coach, clinician and educator she shares with her clients her education, training, job and life experiences, as well as the tools and assessments to make the coaching experience focused, relevant and rewarding.

She can be reached through her web site ExecutiveCoachNY.com.

Managing Stress Around Christmas

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

Many of us are acutely aware that despite Christmas being considered a time of joy it can also be a time of heightened stress and anxiety. This is especially true for people with limited financial resources, families of divorce or separation, or families who are experiencing estrangement or discourse among family members. Sometimes we aim to just get through the season.

The following is a list of strategies that can help ease some of the stress and anxiety.

1. ADJUST YOUR EXPECTATIONS

Having expectations that everything is going to go well and all your preparations and efforts will be well received can open the door to disappointment. People don’t always respond the way we think they’re going to. Thinking: “David is going to LOVE this!” or “Let’s take the kids to see all the lights, that’s what we always when I was growing up”, may have you feeling overwhelmed with disappointment because you didn’t get the response you expected.

2. REMEMBER THAT IT’S OK TO SIMPLIFY

I used to feel that good mothers did lots of baking at Christmas, decorated their house beautifully, sent out cards, did lots of entertaining and had home made food or gifts to give away. I would start feeling stressed by December 1 thinking of all that I should be accomplishing. Since letting go of many of the “shoulds” I’ve come to enjoy Christmas so much more and I’m a lot more fun to be around.

3. REACH OUT TO PEOPLE THAT HAVE NOTHING

It is often suggested that one way of taking the focus off your lack of money or resources is to volunteer some time around Christmas with those who have nothing or no one to share the time with. When we give of ourselves we get so much more in return.

4. LIMIT THE NUMBER OF ACTIVITIES

We are bombarded with special events around Christmas. Apart from things we get invited to attend, the offerings around the city are endless. Remember that young children become over stimulated very easily and often can’t handle a lot of different activities and too many breaks from their routine. Dealing with a lot of temper tantrums around the holidays is not fun for anyone.

5. FOCUS ON SOLUTIONS RATHER THAN PROBLEMS

When we focus on the way we wish things were we find ourselves anxious and often depressed. We can always choose to instead focus on what IS and asking: “How can I make the very best with what we have?” We can expend a lot of energy wishing things were different. We can use that energy to make the best of our present situation and express gratitude for what we have instead of what we don’t have.

Barbara Desmarais is a parenting coach and mother to two teenagers. She is the author of “Raise Your Children But Not Your Voice.” She has been working with parents for seventeen years.

http://www.theparentingcoach.com
barb@theparentingcoach.com
604-624-1783

Minimizing Stress

Sunday, December 14th, 2008

Understanding Stress

Stress has been called “the invisible disease”. It is a disease that may affect you, your organization, and any of the people in it, so you cannot afford to ignore it.

1) What is Stress?

On occasions, all of us experience stress. Beneficial stress can help drive a few of us to become Olympic champions, but harmful stress can drive others to despair. A force as powerful as that should always be handled with respect.

A) The Definition Of Stress

Stress in individuals is defined as any interference that disturbs a person’s healthy mental and physical well-being. It occurs when the body is required to perform beyond its normal range of capabilities. The results of stress are harmful to individuals, families, society, and organizations, which can suffer form, “organizational stress”.

Note:

Learn how to spot your stress warning signals, and then act on them.

B) Its Effects On Society

The social costs of stress are already high-and are increasing steadily. Society bears the cost of public services such as healthcare for those made ill by stress, pension for early retirement brought on by stress, and disability benefits for accidents occurring because of stress. In addition to this, stress often makes people irritable, and this affects the overall quality of everyone’s lives.

Note:

Do not be afraid to talk about situations that you find stressful.

C) Its Effects On Companies

Stress costs industry over $150 billion a year in the US alone – through absenteeism and reduced levels of performance by those who are physically present but mentally absent. In the UK , as much as 60% per cent of all absenteeism is believed to be because of stress related disorders. Anything that can reduce the damaging effects of stress makes workers happier and companies richer.

Note:

Take a stroll when you are stressed – it can help restore your perspective.

D) Its effects On The Body

When the human body is placed under physical or psychological stress, it increases the production of certain hormones, such as adrenaline and cortical. These hormones produce marked changes in the heart rate, blood pressure levels, metabolism, and physical activity. Although this physical reaction will help you to function more effectively when you in pressure for short periods of time, it can be extremely damaging to the body in the long-term.

Manik Thapar (MBA)

http://www.careerpath.cc

Six Strategies to Shun Stress

Thursday, July 10th, 2008

Does your schedule leave you feeling frazzled? Do you find yourself spinning your wheels, running form work to soccer practice to dance class to your parent-teacher conference to the grocery store, then back home to cook dinner? Maybe then you spend a few quality minutes with your husband and children, and possibly squeeze in a little laundry? By the time you fall (fully clothed) into bed, are you out before your head hits the pillow? Between taking care of our families, our homes, and our jobs, many of us don’t know whether we’re coming or going. But we all know someone who seems to be able to do everything without breaking a sweat. You know the one. She’s Ms. Perfect, the mom who makes the rest of us look bad. She works full time, has 2.5 perfect children, and a loving (handsome AND successful) husband. She heads all the committees and bakes cookies (from scratch) for the whole neighborhood every time anything resembling a holiday pops up on the calendar. Oh, and somehow she has time to volunteer at the local soup kitchen every Saturday. And, on top of this, she always manages to look amazing! You despise her, right? Of course, who wouldn’t? But, wait. Let’s hold back the green-eyed monster for a moment and ask ourselves a question. How does she do it?

No matter what you may think, she’s not superhuman. She just manages to stay organized and focused on her goals. She schedules her time wisely and sticks to it.

So, how does an average Jane learn to do this? Don’t worry; it’s not as difficult as you might think. You, too, can have it all! All it takes is a little practice and perseverance. It might be hard to believe, but there is hope for the proverbial chicken running around with her head cut off!

Anne Morrow Lindbergh once said, “Lost time is like a run in a stocking. It always gets worse.”

The simple steps outlined below present a basic blueprint of time management that will help you to stop losing time and start shunning that stress. Give it a shot and you will be amazed at the results.

1. Where is your time going? You probably have no idea. The first step to organizing your day is to get a clear idea of exactly what you’re doing. How do you do this? In a small notebook, sketch a timetable. Divide it into three segments: morning, afternoon, and evening. For five days, carry the notebook with you. At the end of each time segment, record your activities and the amount of time spent on each. You may find it’s more accurate if you record after each activity. For example, a morning segment might begin like this: Sleeping in, 30 minutes. Shower, 15 minutes. Getting ready (clothes, hair makeup), 45 minutes. Getting kids ready, 30 minutes. Breakfast, 10 minutes. Commuting, 45 minutesand so on. At the end of five days, take a serious look at how your time is spent. Could you be doing more, or are you doing too much? You might be surprised to find that you spend more time procrastinating and preparing to get things done than actually doing them.

2. What are your priorities? The next step is to determine exactly what you need (and want) to accomplish. Take a few minutes to list your day to day responsibilities and goals. Give each a rating from one to three, three being most significant. Use this rating to determine what’s worth your time and what may not be. You may find that some of the things you thought were priorities actually aren’t that important. Don’t be afraid to say “no” once in awhile. You’re not the only one who can organize that committee or host that party. When it comes to your home and family, you are allowed to ask for help. Delegate chores to your children or spouse, or even hire outside help if necessary.

3. Be a list maker. According to J. Robin Powell, PH.D., author of The Working Woman’s Guide to Managing Stress, list making alone can reduce stress levels. Each night before you go to bed, make a simple list of what you plan to accomplish the next day. Don’t go overboard. It’s important that it is actually possible to accomplish your goals. You will be able to sleep easily knowing that you are already organized for the next day. You can also keep a working list of more time-consuming projects, such as organizing closets or painting the bathroom. Make a point of completing one project from this list each week, and be sure to update it often.

4. Plan, plan, plan. Get an appointment book small enough to fit in your purse and carry it with you wherever you go. Use it to plan daily, weekly, and monthly activities. For your day to day matters, plan like activities together. For example, plan to run all of your errands in one afternoon. This will help you to avoid running in circles. But, remember to be flexible. Expect unplanned interruptions or events, and be willing to change your schedule on occasion to focus on what’s important. And speaking of focus, try to avoid skipping around. You may end up with a lot of unfinished projects. Staying focused will help you to stay on track and take care of business, giving you a wonderful feeling of accomplishment.

5. Get organized! Adopt that old motto, “A place for everything, and everything in its place.” Be sure your home, your car, and your office are as orderly as possible. Organization promotes a sense of well being and helps you to feel more in control. Bear in mind, it takes time to make time. Time spent organizing is an investment in you. If you find that things are already out of control, schedule several evenings or a weekend to do a good once-over to put everything in order. Throw out or give away what you don’t want or need, then organize the rest. After that, do a little each day to keep it together. You’ll thank yourself.

6. Last, but not least, keep that positive attitude! Don’t allow yourself to dwell on how little time you have; instead, focus on what you’ve got to do. Shun the stress! You don’t have to be on a strict schedule without time for leisure. A big part of effective time management is to remain flexible and set aside more time for you.

Just think, in a few short weeks, you can change your life by making a few simple changes. Furthermore, the next time you see Ms. Perfect, you won’t feel defective. You can just smile and nod, knowing that you’ve learned her little secret.


Angela Atkinson lives in St. Louis, Missouri and has two beautiful sons. She has been writing for 25 years and recently became a stay at home mom, which allows her full time access to both of her passions, her family and her writing. You can contact her at angieeigna@charter.net.

How To Identify And Relieve Stress

Sunday, June 1st, 2008

If you have been suffering with a lack of energy, complaining
about muscle ache and feeling moody, emotional, unmotivated and
extremely tired then it is quite possible that you are suffering
from stress.

The physical and emotional symptoms of stress can interfere with
not only our quality of life and enjoyment, but that of our family
and loved ones also.

So what can you do if you are feeling stressed?

WHAT MAKES YOU STRESSED?

Stress affects each and every one of us to some degree, whether it’s
the minor stress we feel when trying to get to the train station on
time or the more major level when we hear that we have lost our job
or that a loved one has passed away.

Regardless of our individual stress tolerance level, it is important
to identify the symptoms of stress and learn how we can adapt to help
reduce it.

While we may all have different tolerances for stress it is also
true that certain lifestyles or changes in lifestyle can lead to
stress – marriage, divorce, death of a loved one, job change,
job loss or debts are all major stresses.

Other factors such as allergies, shift work, strained
relationships and too much work are also stresses that in
combination can add up to stress.

HOW DO I KNOW IF I’M STRESSED?

Increased stress levels lead to a number of chemical imbalances
in our systems. These imbalances can lead to over tiredness due
to a lack of restful sleep, sore muscles due to a lower pain
tolerance and a negative mood due to a lack of energy and
‘feel good’ chemicals in our system.

If you don’t think that you’ve been feeling the physical effects
of stress perhaps you should look at your lifestyle. Are you
handling tiredness with caffeine and sugar? Are alcohol or drugs
helping you sleep or providing you a ‘feel good’ high? Are you
relying on the adrenaline of working too much for the positive
energy your body and mind needs?

HOW DO I RELIEVE STRESS?

The first thing to do when handling stress is to identify your
personal tolerance level. As different people have different
levels, only you can read your body’s signals and respond to
them accordingly.

It is important to reduce your responsibilities by simplifying
your life. This may simply mean saying no to some extra activities
or duties, or it may mean having a complete change in job or
lifestyle. If you are expecting a large change in your life such
as a new baby or moving house, then maybe you need to remove other
obligations to make room for these changes.

Exercise is a great stress reliever. Try exercising at least 20 minutes three times per week and reducing or totally eliminating
crutches such as alcohol, caffeine, sugar or drugs.

We are living in a world that encourages highly driven, ‘type-A’
personalities. For the good or bad we are not all made equal and
to lead the most contented life it is important to set limits for
ourselves based on our personal abilities. Having a low tolerance
for stress is no more a fault than needing glasses or being
shorter than average – it does however require us to accommodate
our tolerance and take on only as much as our bodies can
adequately handle.

By learning to your stress tolerance level and responding to it
in a positive way you can greatly change your entire outlook on
life. By reducing your stress level, you will find that life
becomes more enjoyable that you ever thought possible.

Mark writes articles on many different subjects. For more
information relating to stress and stress relief visit

http://www.stressreliefzone.com.

Managing Your Every Day Stresses And Anxieties

Thursday, April 3rd, 2008

Looking for all of the answers in how to manage your persistent anxieties and stresses? As an author of a managing fear book, I found it difficult to find all of the answers in managing my anxieties. Although I am a layman and not a professional, I have interviewed many psychologists and clergyman and I have over fifteen years of experience in dealing with fear.

As a result, here is a brief list of techniques that a person can use to help manage their every day stresses and anxieties.

Sometimes, we get stressed when everything happens all at once. When this happens, a person should take a deep breathe and try to find something to do for a few minutes to get their mind off of the problem. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things.

Another technique that is very helpful is to have a small notebook of positive statements that make us feel good. Whenever you come across an affirmation that makes you feel good, write it down in a small notebook that you can carry around with you in your pocket. Whenever you feel anxious, open up your small notebook and read those statements.

When facing a current or upcoming task that overwhelms you with a lot of anxiety, the first thing you can do is to break the task into a series of smaller steps. Completing these smaller tasks one at a time will make the stress more manageable and increases your chances of success.

In dealing with your anxieties, a person should learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of focusing on exaggerated assumptions that may or may not happen, focus on the present and rely on the facts of the present situation.

Our anxieties and stresses can sometimes get the best of us, however there are many helpful resources available to us. It might take some hard work and persistence, but it is possible to find those answers in managing your anxieties.

Stan Popovich is the author of “A Layman’s Guide to Managing
Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods” –
an easy to read book that presents a general overview of
techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and
anxieties. For additional information go to:
http://www.trebleheartbooks.com/mvStanPopovich.html

For free articles on managing fear please go to:

http://www.managingfear.com/